Life & Times of Yours Truely

A Final Farwell

I have decided to end this blog once and for all. A couple months ago, I started it back up in the hopes that I would find that joy I had when I first started blogging 3 years ago. I wanted this site to be a place where I could talk about me, my feelings and even post some humorous articles and pictures. But lately, everything I post has a negative tone and attitude to it and that is not what I wanted.

The fact is this last year has been a very difficult year for me. I have been suffering from major depression since May and I have been hospitalized once for a breakdown and suicide attempt. The doctor started me on meds, but I hated the side effects so I took myself off them. I have been trying to deal with my feelings of loneliness in my own way. It’s been the hardest thing I have ever done in my entire life.

I entered this year with such high hopes and dreams for the future. But now, my dreams are gone and I have no long term plans. I see no future for me. My life and my heart are completely empty and I have nothing left to give.

So this is the end of my blog. It was fun even though no one read it. It will stay active until the domain name runs out. It will then pass into oblivion much the same way as I feel I am doing.

Anyone interested enough can reach me at my email address listed on my person page.

So long and good bye.

Dennis

Picture Of The Week

Cash Back Movie Review

I watched a cute little movie last night I found on Netflix called, “Cash Back.” Its a dark, romantic comedy. I listed the synopsis below.

After a painful break up with his first girlfriend Suzy, Ben, an aspiring artist, develops insomnia. To take his mind off his problem he spends his nights working at a local supermarket, where he meets colorful characters. He falls in love with his colleague Sharon.

He lets his imagination run wild. In particular, he imagines that he can stop time for others, so that he can walk around in a world that is “frozen” like in pause mode of a film. He imagines female clients standing frozen in the supermarket, so that he can undress and draw them.

We see in flashback, with Ben’s voice-over explaining how he always has been impressed by the beauty of the female body, how he, as a young boy, could see a Swedish boarder naked while she was going to and coming from the shower; being Swedish she did not believe this situation required modesty. Also we see little Ben’s friend Sean Higgins showing Ben his parents’ adult magazines. Furthermore we see Sean paying a girl for showing him her genitals.

Sharon is Ben’s date when they go to the birthday party of their boss. Ben meets Suzy who wants to continue their relationship. Ben refuses, but Sharon gets a negative impression seeing Ben with Suzy for a moment, and gets angry.

As a practical joke colleagues Barry and Matt phone him, one of them pretending to be an art gallery owner who is interested in his drawings, and an appointment is made. It turns out well: the gallery owner, seeing Ben’s work, is interested, and an exhibition follows. Sharon also visits it and is impressed not only by Ben’s success, but also by the many paintings portraying her; she is not angry anymore.

The cast of characters is short and sweet and all of them did a great job at conveying what the director wanted. Each with their own character and each adding to the entire story without over whelming the story line.

Cast and characters
• Sean Biggerstaff - Ben Willis
• Emilia Fox - Sharon Pintey
• Shaun Evans - Sean Higgins
• Stuart Goodwin - The Boss
• Michael Dixon - Barry Brickman
• Michael Lambourne - Matt Stephens

I liked this story because it mirrored my life so very closely. Having experienced the same type of emotional trauma and resulting personal issues, I found myself relating to Ben very closely. I can only hope I can find the same happy ending as he did in this movie.

The State Of Professional Sports

Let me just start off by saying that I am a huge sports fan. I used to watch most major sporting events when ever they were on the TV or if I could get tickets. I grew up with season tickets to the Dolphins and I never miss a college basketball game. However, I am growing increasingly frustrated with the direction that sports are going in this country.

You can hardly pick up the paper or turn on the TV without hearing about some high profile athlete getting arrested or becoming involved in some morality scandal. The latest, of coarse being the Michael Vick drama. Athletes seem to think they are above the law and never have to deal with any consequences of their actions.

But what seems to be bothering me the most is the fact that the average sports fan is becoming immune to all the wrong doings. Take for instance the video tape scandal involving the New England Patriots.

The team was caught red handed with tape of the opposing teams’ signals and had been warned previously for the same infractions. Yet, people continue to pass this off as just the way things are done and it’s ok as long as you don’t get caught. Hear that? Cheating is OK as long as you don’t get caught at it. What precedent does this set for the youth of this country?

Now, with the Patriots undefeated through the first half of the season and mounting a serious threat of becoming only the second team in NFL history to go undefeated through the entire season, people are starting to ask the question, “Who was better? The ’72 Dolphins or the ’07 Patriots.

Don Shula recently gave an interview suggestion that an asterisk be placed next to the Patriots name if they do go undefeated reminding everyone that there was the possibility that they obtained this by means other than fair. Yet, on ESPN’s, “Around The Horn” yesterday, one of the panelists suggested that there was, not only no proof of cheating, but since they are so good, they didn’t need to cheat. When another panelist suggested that Miami went undefeated without any cloud of suspicion, someone then said that there was no proof that they didn’t and maybe they were cheating all along but just didn’t get caught.

It is this kind of mentality that makes me want to watch the game with the sound turned off. The sports announcers try to hold themselves up as higher authorities when in fact, most never played a game of organized anything. Yet they criticize, critique and badger the athletes who have been playing all their lives.
What ever happened to reporting the news, whether it be sports related or otherwise, without interjecting one’s own point of view?

I will continue to watch college sports and maybe some professional hockey, but as far as baseball, pro Football and that thug filled baby league called professional basketball, I probably will not be watching those non-events anytime soon.

PS. If matched head to head, the ’07 Patriots would probably beat the ’72 Dolphins by a couple touchdowns. But if you could take the Dolphins team and adjust the players for inflation (make them comparably as big, strong and fast as today athletes) then the Dolphins would spank the Patriots and probably embarrass them on National TV.

What Will The Kids Think Of Next

It seems that there is a new drug in town. It’s called, “Jenkem” and it’s an inhalant that the kids are making that causes hallucinations and what can only be described as a “euphoric high.”

What is so strange about this new drug is that it is made from human waste. Feces and urine to be exact.

What ever happened to sniffing glue and sneaking beer from the parents liquor cabinet? I guess I’m just getting old after all.

Thought For The Day

Grotto Falls

I decided to go on a little hike this last weekend while visiting Brandan in TN. He was not feeling well, so I just decided to go alone. It was a short hike, only 2.2 miles round trip, but was a nice diversion from a stressful weekend.

Grotto Falls is located just a very short drive from Pigeon Forge. It is just one of several hiking trails located in this area in which I hope to be doing soon.

Picture Of The Week

Todays Edition of HNT

What can I say. For once you can see me without my foot inserted.

Recent Hiking Trip

Here are some pictures of a hike I took recently to Indian Flat Falls in the Great Smoky Mountains National Park. This was really the first time I got to use my new camera. It was a great hike covering a little over 8 miles round trip.

Click Thumb Nail To Get Full Size Photo